God gently led me to His way, though I had received the Holy Spirit but not baptized yet. In an early stage, I was not able to have a strong faith in God. It was not easy for me to decide to be baptized, for the long journey to church every Sunday and the difficulty of switching my 23-year customs and values. Ms. S, one of church staff, recommended me to be baptized when christening came near every month. However, every time I said to her, "No thank you. I don't fully understand Christianity yet." So I spent being like a half-Christian for about six months.
I had been experiencing a lot of mysterious events since I received the Holy Spirit in April. As I now trust God in every way, He doesn't show me miracles only to make me known His existence now. I was wondering if God really exists at that time. I think He performed many miracles to tell me "I am here with you." In fact, I couldn't but believe that they were not coincident and He is living and working in my life.
In October, Ms. S. said to me again, "Why don't you receive baptism? This monthfs christening will be the last chance this year." We have baptismal ceremonies through the year but October was the last month for christening at that time. I couldn't decide to be baptized yet. I was suffering a bad stomachache from duodenal ulcer for about ten days before the October's christening. I put up with the pain and didn't go to the doctor. The pain became stronger and stronger and I came to think that it had a meaning. There were some internal conflict, however, I was gradually led to get baptized by the Holy Spirit. God's program is always mysterious. I thank Him for the pain very much. He even used it to carry His plan on me.
Before the christening, I recalled a short dream in June vividly. The world was dark. There were no moon and stars in the sky. I was in a vast desert and I saw thousands and millions of people running away from something. I was also fleeing with my boyfriend hand in hand. We wore white clothing unlike anything I'd ever seen before. Being tired, I looked up and saw a golden cross shining in the dark sky. I raised my right hand up toward the sky, and only we were lifted up into the sky. I woke up and thought that I had a very strange dream.
The day before the christening, I called our friend in common to tell him that I would be baptized the next day. I also told him about the strange dream of six months ago. I said to him, "Don't you think it mysterious? I believe it's a prophetic dream. We will be baptized and become Christians in future. As only I will get baptized, the dream will come half true, won't it?"
It was October 14, Sunday. My boyfriend came to church from Nagoya, long distance on my christening day. After Sunday service, I had to prepare for my baptism. I said to him, "Please wait here for a while. I have to change my dress to clothing for baptism." I was back and saw he also wore white clothing for baptism. It was the second time for him to come to church. I didn't know what was happening to him while I was away from him for a short time. Our church performs baptism by immersion. There is a bath for christening under the floor in our church. Baptism is a kind of funeral for the alive. If we confess our sins and believe Jesus Christ as our Savior, old we will die but be born again and become new selves. There were more than eight people for christening. I was laid on my back into water with a splash and raised quickly. Pastor and others began praying. I felt the time went quickly and slowly.
After the ceremony, I asked my boyfriend why he was baptized. He said to me, "Associate Pastor said, 'When we do something right, we do need courage.'. I still didn't understand the reason he had decided to get baptized only by her word, however, I thought he was led by the Holy Spirit received on the day. (He told me that when he received the Holy Spirit, he felt so refreshed.) Hallelujah! We felt something mild and calm in heart and filled with joy after that for long time. I thought this is very peace given from God. Later I realized that my stomachache disappeared completely. I was so surprised to see that. I think my disease came from my sins. Once God forgave them, I was freed from them and healed. In this way, I became a Christian.
*Note:
That scared dream was a dream "the end of the world". When I read Revelation in the New Testament, I was so surprised to know my dream was very similar to the scene in Revelation. One more thing I was surprised is the white clothing in the dream was the same one for the baptism. I didn't know what kind of clothing for christening before I got baptized.