by David Kilburn

Rubbish is a serious matter in Japan, especially if you live in Tokyo or other major cities. The problem is not so much how to dispose of rubbish but when to create it. For the millions who live in apartment blocks, knowing the right time to create rubbish and when to avoid can mean the difference between living in comfort or in conditions more usually found in the third world.

This lesson in chaos theory begins with the posters that list the days and times when rubbish that meet various criteria can be left for collection. Burnable, non-burnable, recyclable, and rubbished appliances each have their own days and times. Sounds easy, but if oversleeping or a business trip means you miss the day, then that garbage may have to live with you another week or another month. There is no hope of sneaking it out on the wrong days—a friendly neighbor or caretaker will suggest you retrieve it and may even do so for you.

In this carefully ordered world, imagine the shock wave caused by fellow residents who slash open the garbage bags and litter their contents across the street for examination each day. These are meticulous examinations, angry glances and warning cries warn you to cross the road and not disturb the exercise. Meet the City Crows, not the rockabilly group of that name once led by Mickey Curtis, but an army of 40,000 giant black birds who might have flown out of Hitchcock's famous film about avian predators to scavenge for food.

This daily urban warfare has had unexpected consequences, creating new food recipes, new professions, and new technologies. Even so, the final battle is yet to be fought.The most radical suggestion comes from Tokyo's outspoken governor, Shintaro Ishihara, who suggested suggesting people might have to cook crow pies to help solve the problem. The governor also set up the City Crows Strategy Project Team tasked with removing some 30,000 birds from the skies.

Early moves in the counteroffensive include training teams of crow-catchers, devising ways to cover stacked garbage sacks in crow-proof nylon nets, and a search for predators and poisons. All remains quiet in Tokyo Bay; Godzilla has so far declined to do battle with the crows in the battle for Tokyo.

There is more hope in new technologies under development at Utsunomiya University, where researchers are working to develop garbage bags whose taste is so repellent to crows that they will leave the garbage untouched. The future looks promising for garbage bags that taste of pepper, salt, and vinegar. Researchers say crows avoid hot- and acid-tasting food. However, no one is crowing about this yet. Crows are highly intelligent and adaptable beasts and may yet prove able to take their repulsive medicine with impunity.

However, no one knows how 40,000 crows might react if they were to find the favorite garbage menus denied them one morning. Presumably they would not just fly away peaceably or roll over and die. One morning there could be a final, terrible battle to decide if Tokyo's future is to be a city of birds. A squad of crow-busters may already be in training with eyes on the box office revenues of a sequel Hitchcock's The Birds, which should be more than enough to finance all these projects.